Making lists

Last week I started making a list of my frustration and I realized I have many. I was too scared to count them but I think they are over 30. They are frustration regarding my job, my life in general, school and many others, uncategorized. The good thing about the list is that when making it they were indeed many, but when reading them I realized which are the things that matter the most. Sometimes I stress myself to much with things that are not important. I don’t want to waste time anymore with those. I want to do the things that are important for me. Then I realized some of those things written there have a solution and I can solve them, some will probably have in the future and the others maybe won’t even matter in a few years.
In the end making a list with frustrations is good. Now I’m working on a list with the things that are good and work well in my life.

Mixture of feelings

I’m happy for Erika, she was elected MC VP TM in AIESEC Hungary. AIESEC Tg.Mures proved again it has valuable people that are appreciated abroad. After Romeo was elected in the MC of AIESEC Bahrain and Tamas in the national support team (NTT) it was Erika’s turn to get where she deserves. I wish them all a great experience this year, an experience that will help them grow, learn and make their dreams come true.

I’m nostalgic when thinking that time passes by so fast. It is like yesterday when I first got in an NGO. Yesterday I’ve seen Laura, an old friend from LOC. It was really nice seeing her, we talked about how great those times were, how much fun we had, and how nice were the camps. Afterwards I’ve spend some time with Cody and I’ve told her some funny stories from AIESEC, from all the LPMs I’ve been to. Can’t believe there are so many things that have changed but also so many things that are being “reinvented”. It’s recruitment time in AIESEC and on Monday I went to the Big Picture. All the memories I have from the past recruitments came back into my memory. I see some things being improved but unfortunately also mistakes that are done again and I’m sad to see that. Hope they will realize this and they will recover. Hope they will reach their objectives and new members will join and see how great AIESEC is.

I’m optimistic that this year will be a good one at work, that the situation we are going through this year will pass and will help us improve our activity.

I’m tired of learning and preparing projects for master but I have to. This year I will finish hopefully both with the second university and with the master. No more school for me in the following years.

I’m disappointed that many people around me are not open minded, that they are constrained by tradition and they do things just because “this is the way” having no explanation for the reason it is this way, not thinking by themselves and doing things just because others told them to do.

I’m scared in making some changes in my life, things that I’ve postponed so much, changes that must be done and that will change my life and will influence people around me.

I’m worried for some dear people that are not feeling very well. Hope there’s nothing bad with them and that they will get better.

I’m ready for the next days. I’m happy the weekend is coming and I will have some time to relax and hopefully meet with some friends.

I don’t want to plan any more. I just want to let myself surprised.

Favorite days of the week

Definitely my favorite days of the week are Saturday and Sunday and eventually Friday evening. Why? Because it’s then when I have some time for myself, I have time to relax and sleep some more in the morning (1 extra hour really counts). After busy weeks with work and study at master and other stuff the weekend is most welcomed.
Last weekend was great. On Saturday morning I meet again with some friends for an interesting study afterwards I went to Sovata to LPM (Local Planning Meeting) – it’s odd that now I have to explain what these acronym means, I was so used with people around me understanding every time what I say but now things have changed – on the way I saw some beautiful full rainbows. The conference was nice, I really like LPMs. I didn’t attend many sessions, I preferred staying and talking with people, respecting the tradition and making another movie, relaxing and enjoying a wonderful time. The conference gave me a lot of energy, especially the session when we wrote some words of encouragement to one another. Despite the lack of sleep I was full of energy when I came back, energy that helped me pass this week.
The last weekend ended with a great surprise, some friends prepared a special evening for us (the girls) for 8th of March. Good food, music and funny moments was the perfect combination for ending a great weekend.
Again it’s weekend, a different one, no conference but great time this morning with some friends again for an interesting study, time to sleep and relax. Tomorrow it’s a new Sunday that I want to enjoy. No plans yet but I hope it will be great.

Take the best side

Lately I was feeling sad and frustrated because many things in my life are not the way I expected. I was disappointed to see that my dreams don’t come true (maybe it’s not the time or maybe they just won’t happen). All these things made me feel bad.
On Sunday I took the decisions to do something about this. There are many things I can not change but there one thing that I can do. STOP thinking just about the bad things in my life (which in the end they might not be that bad – If I analyze them more in details) and START taking the good side of things. DO at least one good thing for others EVERY DAY.

At the end of day I want to think just about the things that made me smile, just about the moments when I was happy (even if it was just for while), to see the full side of the glass.

Leapsa

Reading my friends blogs I saw they all replied to leapsa. I remember I also received some and now it’s time to answer.
Reka gave me one last year: special people who influenced my life. Well … there are a lot of people that influenced my life, starting with my parents and continuing with my friends. I think all the people I' meet can have an influence, either an influence in doing something either an influence in not doing something, in not being like them. In conclusion there are many
Then I received one from Dorin, a different one: to vote my favorite trainer. Well I’ve done that before receiving this leapsa.
And last from Cami: what do I think about when I can sleep at night. Well … recently I did not have this problem, I am very tired and when I go to bed I feel asleep in less than 5 minutes. But when I can't sleep I like to think about things that I would like to do, I like to plan stuff.
Thank you guys for leapsa. I don’t think I would pass it on to someone in particular. If someone reads this post and wants to take it, go ahead.

Changing my "TO DO LIST"

Reading one day Romeo’s blog he asked what motivates someone. I gave some answers and since then I have been thinking about this, what motivates me and most of all how much time do I spend doing things that motivate me. I realize that the amount of time allocated for things that motivate me is quite small. I tend to do a lot of things but many of those are just things that I have to do and not things that I necessarily like. I have to change my time management system and start doing things that I like more often.

At the beginning of this year I thought a little bit about the things that I want to achieve this year. Now that a month has already past I realize I haven’t done that much. The only thing that I realized to do is meeting with some friends and having some great discussions with them. I realized how much talking to a friend means to me. I’m sorry for the last years when this was a not a priority. Now I want to change this.

Thank you for those who have been there for me in the last month, the ones I had some interesting discussions.

Thank you Cosmin for the coaching session, it made me realize that I can still involve in AIESEC.

Thank you Dorin for listening to me. I really needed that day to talk to someone.

Thank you Cami for taking some time to talk.

Thank you Romeo for an interesting discussion. If you are ready to start that club you can count on me.

Thank you Erika for a great talk. I’m sure that you will take the best decision. I support you no matter what one will be.

Thank you Bianca for a small talk, even if it was at the telephone. Hope we will have some time this next week to actually meet.

Thank you Roxy for your advice. I’m really happy and proud of you.

My “to do list” is changing from now on. Instead of things to do I want to write friends to meet and talk. Because friend matter more to me than things.

A new year, a new beginning

2008 passed incredibly fast. There are so many things that happened in 2008. I can’t believe it. I finished university, got a job, got out of AIESEC and became an alumna, took some decisions that changed my life completely. It was a great year and I hope this one will be even greater.

I still can’t believe my short holiday it’s over. It was short but nice. I had the chance to relax a little bit and spend a few days with my grandma. Then I had the chance to see some old friends. On the 24^th and on the 25^th I went carol singing with my friends from AIESEC. It was nice seeing Emese (back from Poland), Romeo (back from Hungary), Marius, my EB colleagues, also seeing the members from AIESEC, and spending again the Christmas Eve with them, talking and playing Mafia :)

Last Tuesday I left Mures and went to Saulia to spend 4 great days there. After planning and planning different games and activities, after preparing a lot of stuff the fun began. In a great atmosphere we started playing mime, watching movies, enjoying “Visez pentru tine”, presenting “Piratii din Caraibe”, showing our talents at karaoke, enjoying a short but fun hour of commercials (like we were at “Noaptea devoratorilor”), remembering 2008, then some of us trying to skate on the ice of the lake and some of us trying to get some sleep. I spend a great time there, relaxing and enjoying special moments with friends.

But what is nice finishes really fast. You come home and it’s like the whole world changes. You remember you have work to do, things to learn, exams to prepare for. Today I got back to work. It was nice seeing my colleagues but it wasn’t that nice working again, and most of all freezing in the office because there was no heat.

Anyway, I’m preparing for a new year, that I hope it will be better than the last one. Like every beginning I have a lot of dreams and plans, a lot of things that I want for myself and for people around me. I am ready to fight, to work, to climb the mountains that will come ahead, to make my dreams come true.

What happened lately

Reading some friend’s blogs I realized what they write is completely different from what I write. They like to analyze things, to challenge others to write their opinion, to write about interesting things they find out. My blog is different I like to write about things that happen to me, about my weekends, about my friends.

So, in order to continue with my “tradition” I want to write about what happened lately. I like to write about this here, because it’s like keeping an online “diary” in which I can look and remember, it’s like my “online agenda”, but a different agenda, not with hours and schedules but with feelings and impressions.

Last month I attended Partners & Alumni Night in AIESEC Tg.Mures. It was a great event, celebrating 8 years of @ in Tg.Mures, celebrating the great results the LC had this year, seeing old friends, being there as an alumna, not as an organizer. All the things remembered me about the great time spent in AIESEC.

The next day continued with a great youth conference that I attended in Mures, a conference that made me wonder if I am just a young person or a young person with an impact. I want to be a young person with an impact in all that I do.

December continued with great time spent in AIESEC. I was chair for the LCC. It was strange. Just a few months ago I was writing on facebook with Romeo, Marius and Emese the fact the we want to run for EB J We were discussing for what should we run this time, if should try something new or run for the same position. Of course it was just a joke, but in a way I wish it weren’t. Anyway I was chair, and it was nice seeing people in front presenting their strategy for the coming year, seeing them nervous. I remembered I was just like them a few years ago.

The last great thing that happened was the Christmas Party we had with the company in Sovata. Even though it’s not Christmas yet, we decided to celebrate and we had a party for the staff. I was involved in organizing it. It turned out to be a great party, except some few details that you can not control. We had fun organizing it and presenting the events during the party, listening to the band and last but not least going to a foster house and taking some presents for the kids that live there. Seeing the kids enjoying their presents almost brought tears into our eyes. It made us all realize what’s important in this world. It was great lesson and I’m sure we all learned something from it.

State of mind

Lately I tend to “copy” the state of mind people, around me, have. I was always trying not to be so influenced by what others are feeling but lately I realized sometimes it is impossible, at least for me.

Last week a colleague of mine found out she is going to be promoted in a much higher position. I got really happy when I found out because I know how much she works and how much she deserves this. She was happy and excited but at the same time a little bit scared because it’s going to be really hard, she has to learn a lot and some people won’t offer her the support she needs. This made me also a little bit scared for her because I want her to succeed but I know how things work and how hard it will be for her.

On Friday I went to Sovata with a colleague. It was the first time I was driving the company’s car. At the beginning I was a little bit scared because the weather was foggy, but my friend was really excited so I got excited too. In the end our small trip turned out to be a great experience.

Today I went to Alba for some interviews for work. Before coming home, my colleague received some bad news and he was sad and stressed all the way back. Even if I tried to keep my optimism I couldn’t and I got sad as well, not being able to encourage him, realizing there is nothing we can do to change the situation. The way back was the longest way ever, lot of silent moments, lot of eagerness to get home.

It’s strange how I tend to get the mood people around me have. In a way this is good if people around me are happy and excited about something and I’m not, but if they are sad it’s really hard for me to encourage them and offer them my support without getting sad as well.

Great weekends

Saturday and Sunday became lately my favorite days of the week J. I like the week also but weekend is great, I have the chance to relax, go out with my friends, and spend time with people. My last weekends were great.

It all started with a great weekend in Saulia, a great weekend that at first I didn’t want to attend, but now I am so happy I did. There were to great days, were I had the chance to reanalyze my life, to set my priorities. There were two great days for self reflexion but not only.

The next weekend was again a great one, a trip to Lugoj to visit my cousins (Patricia & Ximena) and a small trip to Timisoara, to visit the town. I enjoyed this weekend a lot, because besides driving almost all the way and seeing my favorite cousins I also meet in Timisoara with Andreea. Even if it was just for one hour, it was great to see her and talk with her.

The next weekend it was Ioana and Sanda’s birthdays and it was fun going with Roxy and trying to buy some gifts for the girls, hard to choose something for them but fun J.

Then there was a weekend full of AIESEC interviews, 64 new members joined AIESEC TGM and I had the chance to interview some of them. I remembered the times I was doing recruitment, the time I was in AIESEC, all the great moments I’ve spend there.

And last, this weekend, with a small AIESEC party, a great chance to see the new members, to see old members, to see my friends but also with a big possibility to relax J

I realized lately how much people mean to me, how important are my friends in my life. I want for the future my friends to be a priority in my life and to spend as much time as possible with them, no matter if it’s during the weekend or during the week.

Where is the passion?

I am a little bit disappointed of the people around me, of the people I work with. It seams that my system of values is totally different than the one people around me have.

After being in two NGOs for so long it is hard to see the difference between an NGO and an organization. Both in LOC and AIESEC people that worked there were full of passion for their work, were interested in the organization growth, were giving their best to make things right. We didn’t work there for money, we were just volunteers but we had passion, we had fun while doing things and we were interested in people around us and in our development, we wanted always more.

Now at work I see also the not so bright side. People are not so interested in the growth of the company; don’t put passion in their work. They just come to work, do their job and then go home; they are not interested how the company they work in is positioned on the market. I have the feeling people come to work, just to have a job and earn some money. In rest no interest in personal or professional development. Some will probably even ask “What’s that?”. I am a little bit disappointed to see that people like the routine, do their job but don’t care if things are not done on time. An old saying says “Don’t leave for tomorrow what you can do today”; well some don’t leave for tomorrow but for the day after tomorrow. And it’s sad to see that. Of course there are also exceptions, people that work hard, put passion and care about others and about the growth of the company. I admire these people and they are really some role models for me.

I wonder how are things in other companies.
Anyway 'till I'll found out on my own hope I won’t loose my passion for the things I like.

Good to great

I have started to read at work a book, called “Good to great”, about growth. Even if I didn’t have time to read many pages from it, the title made me think about my development, about my growth, about my way to becoming from good GREAT both in my personal and professional life. Today I was reading a post on Romeo’s blog about who helps you in life and I remembered all the persons that had an impact in my life, all the persons that contributed to the person I am today.

I am really thankful to these persons because they helped me a lot, they helped me grow, showed me a better world, empowered me.

So… thank you

Mom, dad, grandparents for your love

Mona for showing me a great way that changed my life forever

Brian for showing me how great life can be when you are on the right path

Alin for challenging me to take opportunities and face my fears

EB 05-06 for great moments (Sanda for being there to talk to at any hour; Radu for making me laugh; Dragos for making me see the whole picture when if comes to do something; Suciulica for listening to me when I was complaining)

EB 06-07 for even greater moments, for great result (Bori for making me smile; Emese for making me see the bright side of things; Marius for being a good leader and offering me trust and support; Romeo for making me see how important people are and how important is to fight for what you want; Roxy for being my best friend, always there for me, to listen, to offer an advice)

Andreea for being such a great friend

Cristina for encouraging me never to give up and fight for what is truly important, for following my passion

Erika for continuing my dream

and the list could go on and on

Thank you all for all these things and for much more.

Thank you for helping me getting closer to the mountain top.

A place that changed my life

This post is dedicated to a place (an organization actually) that changed my life, and that I was really thinking about lately. It is the first organization I interacted with, the first place where I was a volunteer, the first place where I discovered that this world is not only about us (me, my family, my friends and some acquaintances), but it’s also about the people and things that are around us and that sometimes we don’t see or don’t want to see.

This organization is LOC (Livada Orphan Care), an American Romanian organization that has some programs for orphans. I joined this organization in 2002 when I was in high school. At first I joined it because I just wanted to something extra school but soon the experience that I lived there changed my life. I realized how lucky I am of having a family, friends, food, cloths, a place to live, the possibility to go to school and other small stuff that for us seem normal to have. I realized how much joy 2 hours/week spent with them (the orphans) can bring in their hearts, how much it means for them to give them a hug, to smile to them, to play with them, to share our time.

Besides those, there was one thing that impressed me a lot: the people involved, the volunteers from USA and Romania, people always smiling and willing to help, always ready and full of joy, always putting the kids on the first place, always full of energy, dedicating their time and sharing their love.

I spent there almost 3 years, 3 great years of my life that helped me a lot develop myself personally. I miss that place, things there have changed a lot and many of the people I worked with are no longer there; some went back to USA, others are in different towns, others still in Tg.Mures but, like me, taking other paths in their lives. There are still many activities for the kinds every summer and I’m glad about that, I’m glad that there are still people willing to bring a smile on those kids’ faces.

I will never forget that place, a place that changed my life, people and experiences that brought a contribution to who I am today.

In the system

Today I joined the system, as some like to call it; today I had my first official day at work. I will be working on HR a company in Tg.Mures. It was really nice "first day", it was a day that made me realize how time goes by and our lives change.

It’s strange how we like to play when we are little, how we like to pretend we are adults and we have different jobs but when we are adults we would like to be again kids and play, have no responsibilities and just live the days as they come, never worrying about the future because our parents are there.

Unfortunately or maybe luckily we can not turn back time we can just enjoy the present and plan the future. Now we can take our own decisions and work hard to reach our objectives.

As many others colleagues and friends I started a new beginning, hopefully a really nice one because I like the things that I will do (as far as I had the chance to analyze my job description).

Wishing all my friends great “beginnings”

Workaholic

A workaholic is a person who is addicted to work.

Am I a workaholic? Some say I am, I think I’m still searching for the right answer.

It’s not that I’m addicted to work, or I like working very much it’s just that I like to get involved into things, I like to be useful, to do something not just waste time in front of my TV, playing sudoku on the computer or going to Weekend.

For the first time in the last years a have holyday. I graduated and now I’m on holyday, no more meetings to attend, no more projects to get involved into, no more study. For me this is strange because I’m not used in doing nothing. After graduation I got involved in organizing a festival, it was great even if I didn’t have to do much, most of the things were already done, but still it was nice to know that for one week I had something planned every day, I had things to do, and most of all were things that I like doing, I like organizing, plus the people I worked with are great. But now that the festival is over I look into my agenda and I see just blank spaces, no more meetings, no more stuff to do.

Yesterday I was chair for a Big Picture in AIESEC. It was nice, I missed AIESEC, I missed attending LC meetings, finding out what they have done since I left the organization. Still one day here, one day there is not enough on my agenda :)

Some say “get a job” well I’m not in a hurry of doing that, I know that at the right time that will happen but until then I want to enjoy doing things that I like, getting involved in things that I love to do. I want to be surprised with opportunities that come ahead this summer.

In the end, I don't consider myself a workaholic, I'm just proactive :)

Another month

A great month is about to be over. A lot of things happened, some were good, some great, others not so good but this is life.

It all started with a great day spent in Saulia. It was a day full of fun, full of joy, of great moments, great feelings, great people. At first I didn't know for sure I will be able to go, but mountains that stay in your way can be moved if you believe. It was an amazing day and I hope I will have such days again this summer.

Another great moment was the Graduation Party. At first I was a little bit sad because we were only 4 persons from my group that went to the party; it was sad that after 4 years we were only 4 persons interested in spending time together. One thing that I know for sure is that this at least these 3 persons are now my friend and I will keep in contact with no matter were life takes us. The party turned out to be great, we had a lot of fun with colleagues from other groups and looking at the pictures I don’t regret, not even for a second, that I went.

An important event was last week, the final exam + the presentation of the final project, the one and only LICENTA. This turned out to be ok also. Have to admit I was a little bit scared at first, I was tired and stressed but in the end everything was ok. After 4 years of study now I finally finish a period of my life. On Friday I’ll have the Graduation at the University with my colleagues but also friends from AIESEC, that will graduate this year also.

A period of my life ended, another one will start soon

My place in this world

In my last post I was writing about the fact that I will graduate soon (there is only the final exam and graduation day left) but besides graduating there is something else getting to an end in my life, my AIESEC life.

12 days ago I became officially an AIESEC alumna at LPM in Sovata. It’s strange how an experience starts and ends almost in the same place. In October 2004 after I joined AIESEC I attended my first AIESEC conference (LTS) in Sovata, and now (after attending many any others … some in Sovata) my last conference (as AIESEC member) ends there. It was a nice moment to be there, to meet the new members, see some old friends and see my colleagues from the previous EBs. It was also nice last week to have the first involvement as an alumna and be the chair for NGO Café.

Still all this is like a bitter sweet taste. For the last years I knew where my place in this world was. It was in AIESEC, the place where I felt like home, where I enjoyed working, planning, spending time with friends. Now it’s over, and I’m searching for my place, I trying to take the best decisions in life, to go on the right path. Most probably I won’t find a place like AIESEC, a place where I can work, enjoy what I’m doing and also have fun with my friends. One thing I know for sure is that AIESEC Tg.Mures will be my ”home” when it comes to AIESEC, will be the place where I will go to see friends and remember good old times.

In major lines I know what I want to do in the future, I know where I want to work and I know how to reach my objectives but I want to leave place also for surprises. I want to let myself surprised by little things in my life, by little miracles that happen around me everyday (and which I didn’t see before), by friends and circumstances, by things that in the end of the day bring the smile on my face.

4 years getting to an end

Yesterday it was the last day of school, the last day of courses. I can not believe it. It’s amazing how time goes by so fast, 4 years have passed so quickly. It is like yesterday when I’ve finished high school, when each of my colleagues started his/her own way in life, when each one chose a university, a different town to spend the next years. Time has passed, we all have changed, took decisions, some got a job, some got married, some went abroad, we all tried to make our life better.

Now the process is repeating, different people but still colleagues. We were not so close but still there are things we discovered we have in common, still we managed to make some friends. We will be graduating soon and start our own way in life and this is a little bit scary, there will be no more “holidays” during the week because we are not in the mood to go to classes, no more breaks to relax and hope the teacher will forget to come back, no more negotiations with the teachers to give us an easy exam.

Yesterday I attended an interesting discussion mostly based on the fact that “today is the first day of the beginning of our life”, today is the day when we have to set our goals (if we didn’t so far) and start working hard and be perseverant to achieve them. Even if we finish university and say “I’ve done learning” the learning process just begins and it will continue every day until the end of our life.

In major lines I decided what I want to do and I just have to put things in practice. I’m thankful for the great years that passed, for the great experiences I’ve lived during university with my colleagues, in AIESEC, with my friends. Now I’m getting ready for the last days, for the last (but hardest) exams, for the future.

Life goes on

Time goes by very fast, I can not believe it’s already March; there are only few more months of school, only few more months of AIESEC. There are many days in which I’m not in the mood for studying and in those days I think about the past, about what I was doing at this time in the last years.

- 2005 I was in my first year of University, I was working for a project in AIESEC (Sales & Marketing School, I was preparing for being VP HR in AIESEC Tg.Mures, I was excited and ready to learn new things.

- 2006 I was preparing again for a new VP HR term (still in AIESEC Tg.Mures), I was preparing for Spring Recruitment, still excited and ready to learn and implement new things in the LC, make AIESEC Tg.Mures grow.

- 2007 I was finishing my VP HR term preparing the new VP, I was coaching a great team that was working for Personal Training Camp, I was getting ready to run for Regional Coach in AIESEC Romania.

And now, it’s 2008. My Regional Coach term is getting closer to its end (today I’m expecting to receive the applications of the people running for RC 0809), I’m getting ready to finish university, I’m thinking about the great moments I’ve had in the last years, not only in this period but during these whole years, since I started University, since I joined AIESEC.

It was the greatest period of my life and I’m a little bit sad it’s about to be over. But someone told me recently not to leave in the past. There are many good things and many great moments waiting for me. Life goes on.

I realize this is really true. Everything at one point turns into a memory, that is why we should try to catch the experiences and live them at their maximum every day, we should appreciate life and people around us more every day because it’s up to us if we make our memories be great or not.

Thankful for being blessed with great memories and great people around me

My 2008

A new years started (actually 18 days ago - looking at the time almost 19 - but this is not that important). This is my first post for 2008 and hope to be one of many others.

For the moment 2008 it's a year full of surprises, full of unknown. There are many things waiting for me this year, exams at the universities, the scary “licenta”, 4 more month of coaching in AIESEC and many decisions to take (decisions that I want to be the right ones). 2007 was a great year, I had the opportunity to experience new things, to make new friends and to learn a lot of things. I am full of hope and faith that this year will be at least as good as the last one, if not even better.

I am ready to face the challenges that will appear in my life. No matter where life will take me on its path I want to put passion in my work and never forget what's my dream and the most important things in my life.

Waiting for a great 2008